THE CANADIAN PRESS CALGARY -- A human rights panel says an Alberta man and a group called the Concerned Christian Coalition broke the province's human rights law by writing a letter that likely exposed gays to hatred and contempt. The letter, written by Stephen Boissoin in 2002 when he was a member of the coalition, was published in the Red Deer Advocate newspaper. The letter was entitled "Homosexual agenda wicked" and suggested gays are as immoral as pedophiles, drug dealers and pimps.
** A break here for word play! How many different ways can we read that title? **
1. Homosexual Agenda Wicked ("Listen up, concerned citizens! Homosexual people have an agenda and it is evil.")
2. Homosexual! Agenda?! Wicked! ("I'm homosexual. I have an agenda? I'm stoked about that! It is radically awesome!"
3. Homosexual Agenda: Wicked. ("Welcome, homosexuals. Is everyone here? Great. As scheduled, we'll start off by discussing the hit Broadway musical..."
4. Homosexual! Agenda - Wicked! (Hey, look, over there, a homosexual! I shall change my mindset and intentions to wicked mode!")
Judging by the body of the letter, its author was probably intending the first interpretation. But maybe not. This could all be one big misunderstanding.
Actual article at: http://www.canoe.ca/WesternTicker/CANOE-wire.Alta-Gay-Hate-Ruling.html
Saturday, December 1, 2007
Friday, November 30, 2007
jokes: SatLav!
LONDON - Westminster City Council today launched "SatLav" - a toilet-finding service for cell phone users.
Having used cell phones to find public toilets for years, London’s gay men are once again ahead of the curve.
RCMP officers seized a computer at CBC Manitoba's downtown Winnipeg headquarters last week, but no one is saying why or what sort of content may be on its hard drive.
For years there was only speculation – could this be the proof of an Unfriendly Giant?
LONDON - Richard Leigh, author of the Holy Blood and the Holy Grail, who unsuccessfully sued for plagiarism over The Da Vinci Code, has died.
This guy had a rough last few years on Earth, but it might get worse. Out of the frying pan...
Having used cell phones to find public toilets for years, London’s gay men are once again ahead of the curve.
RCMP officers seized a computer at CBC Manitoba's downtown Winnipeg headquarters last week, but no one is saying why or what sort of content may be on its hard drive.
For years there was only speculation – could this be the proof of an Unfriendly Giant?
LONDON - Richard Leigh, author of the Holy Blood and the Holy Grail, who unsuccessfully sued for plagiarism over The Da Vinci Code, has died.
This guy had a rough last few years on Earth, but it might get worse. Out of the frying pan...
Best alarm clock ever
Since leaving my day job a few days back, I've struggled to maintain a strict schedule and wake up when I should. I must start the day early, but of course the reasons aren't as convincingly immediate.
I finally arrived at a workable solution - I've been up bright and early ever since! Here's the easy step-by-step method:
1. Obtain a cute chick. Perhaps one with a naturally tan skin tone, that evokes the kiss of sunlight even on a dark morning in the depths of a Calgary winter.
II. Tell her of your resolve. Make it clear that her help is appreciated and success will result in more such evenings followed by light and yet nourishing breakfasts.
III. Cuddle up with her. Go to sleep (eventually).
IV. Wake up and be gently but firmly nudged out of bed and into jogging clothes by the cute chick in your bed. She will keep it warm.
V. Return, shower and wake up the cute chick by a method of your choosing. Drink Earl Grey tea and eat fruit together.
Woman: innovator, nurturer, alarm clock. Is there anything she can't do?
I finally arrived at a workable solution - I've been up bright and early ever since! Here's the easy step-by-step method:
1. Obtain a cute chick. Perhaps one with a naturally tan skin tone, that evokes the kiss of sunlight even on a dark morning in the depths of a Calgary winter.
II. Tell her of your resolve. Make it clear that her help is appreciated and success will result in more such evenings followed by light and yet nourishing breakfasts.
III. Cuddle up with her. Go to sleep (eventually).
IV. Wake up and be gently but firmly nudged out of bed and into jogging clothes by the cute chick in your bed. She will keep it warm.
V. Return, shower and wake up the cute chick by a method of your choosing. Drink Earl Grey tea and eat fruit together.
Woman: innovator, nurturer, alarm clock. Is there anything she can't do?
Thursday, November 29, 2007
jokes: Brooke Shields says we can have more!
NEW YORK - Brooke Shields hopes her upcoming show, "Lipstick Jungle," will convince women that they shouldn't be afraid to want it all.
The SPIKE TV network is offering women a counterpoint with their new program, “Shut up and Settle”.
Next month, the cancer arm of the World Health Organization will classify shift work as a "probable" carcinogen, the same category as cancer-causing agents like anabolic steroids, ultraviolet radiation and diesel engine exhaust.
So if you’re wondering what happened to all the bodybuilders at those 24-hour gyms, now you know: they’re at chemo.
The SPIKE TV network is offering women a counterpoint with their new program, “Shut up and Settle”.
Next month, the cancer arm of the World Health Organization will classify shift work as a "probable" carcinogen, the same category as cancer-causing agents like anabolic steroids, ultraviolet radiation and diesel engine exhaust.
So if you’re wondering what happened to all the bodybuilders at those 24-hour gyms, now you know: they’re at chemo.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
jokes: marriage and young'uns
PROVO, Utah - A Utah couple stand accused of kidnapping their daughter on the eve of her wedding.
Reached for comment, Utah parents said “Well, we sympathize with- what? they were forcing their daughter to NOT get married?!”
A Chinese man is suing for divorce after discovering that he is the father of only one of his twins.
Although upset, the mother of the twins is looking on the bright side: “At least they’re both boys.”
Reached for comment, Utah parents said “Well, we sympathize with- what? they were forcing their daughter to NOT get married?!”
A Chinese man is suing for divorce after discovering that he is the father of only one of his twins.
Although upset, the mother of the twins is looking on the bright side: “At least they’re both boys.”
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
jokes: climate change, have-not provinces
OTTAWA - Efforts to reduce global warming through technological innovations that improve fuel efficiency may be doomed and could even make the situation worse, says a new report.
In related news, big businesses and individuals heaved a sigh of relief as a new report on global warming gave them an excuse to stop trying.
OTTAWA - Native leaders from the West Coast and the South Pacific are pressuring the federal government to establish firm targets for reducing greenhouse gas emissions. Members of the Pacific People's Partnership say climate change is having a huge impact on indigenous communities.
Yeah. Because if there’s anything that really spurs our government to action, it’s the suffering of indigenous peoples.
FREDERICTON - New Brunswick's Liberal government says its throne speech is a road map to a self-sufficient future for the have-not province.
A spokesperson for the Alberta provincial government responded: “Self-sufficiency huh? How about you carry us for a couple of decades, then we’ll call it even.”
In related news, big businesses and individuals heaved a sigh of relief as a new report on global warming gave them an excuse to stop trying.
OTTAWA - Native leaders from the West Coast and the South Pacific are pressuring the federal government to establish firm targets for reducing greenhouse gas emissions. Members of the Pacific People's Partnership say climate change is having a huge impact on indigenous communities.
Yeah. Because if there’s anything that really spurs our government to action, it’s the suffering of indigenous peoples.
FREDERICTON - New Brunswick's Liberal government says its throne speech is a road map to a self-sufficient future for the have-not province.
A spokesperson for the Alberta provincial government responded: “Self-sufficiency huh? How about you carry us for a couple of decades, then we’ll call it even.”
Monday, November 26, 2007
jokes: glaciers and pepper spray
EL ALTO, Bolivia – The glaciers of the Andes are melting at an alarming rate, raising fears for the area’s water supply.
Runoff from the glaciers will be available in bottles here in North America, under the brand name Our Earth is Dying and This is its Blood, You Selfish Bastards.
SAN JUAN, Puerto Rico - Ingrid Marie Rivera won Puerto Rico’s Miss spot in the Miss Universe pageant, in spite of sabotage that included pepper spray in her gowns and makeup that caused her to break out in hives.
There is an upside, as she is now a strong favorite for the Miss Calamine Lotion crown.
Runoff from the glaciers will be available in bottles here in North America, under the brand name Our Earth is Dying and This is its Blood, You Selfish Bastards.
SAN JUAN, Puerto Rico - Ingrid Marie Rivera won Puerto Rico’s Miss spot in the Miss Universe pageant, in spite of sabotage that included pepper spray in her gowns and makeup that caused her to break out in hives.
There is an upside, as she is now a strong favorite for the Miss Calamine Lotion crown.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)